To the Editor:
When I was in the Army they didn’t allow gays in the service, then along came Bill Clinton and his “Don’t Ask-Don’t Tell.” Next came gay marriage and Barack Obama, who said it was alright for people to use the other gender’s washrooms, provided they identified themselves as being of the other sex.
There are many other relationships other than the traditional male-female roles and partnerships. With the 2020 election coming up one has to wonder, what will be the next one the democrat party will normalize in their efforts to win the presidency? I have to believe that bestiality (commonly misspelled beastiality) will be their next cause.
It makes sense for them to do so. There are many lonely people who’s only companion is their cat, dog, pony, or hamster, so why shouldn’t they be allowed to marry? Sure, there will be plenty of push back from stuffy Republicans and church groups who will claim that marriage is between members of the same species. Meanwhile, the person who’s selected to oppose President Trump will be able to promote bestiality as a show of their party’s compassion and acceptance of others. They will make their case by asking how anyone could ever discriminate against people who love animals, some of whom reeaaally love animals.
If they are successful in getting such marriages legalized they can capture the White House and be able to pass the New Green Deal. For those who don’t know, the New Green Deal will eliminate all beef and milk production because the alarmist say bovine flatulence is a major reason why the world is to an end in 12 years.
They will accomplish their goals by claiming that it’s inhumane for someone’s spouse to be prevented from voting just because they have four legs, a tail, and make as many blunders as Joe Biden. They will reason that nowhere in the law does it specifically say that the right to vote is restricted to humans, it only mentions conditions for “people” to have the right to vote. That should not prevent cattle from being able to vote on their fate because I constantly hear “people” saying things like, “She’s a fat heifer,” and “he’s as ornery as a bull.” They also say that you are what you eat, and we eat a lot of beef which means that “people” are cattle, and that makes cattle “people.”
Furthermore, the Supreme Court has ruled against requiring voters to be able to pass a literacy and civics exam which is also darn good news for AOC and her Squad of supporters. An eligible voter doesn’t have to be able to speak English, or know our customs and laws, an since the democrat party is already in favor of letting people vote for them who are not citizens, because they didn’t bother to enter the country legally, they will certainly want to extend such privileges to those who were born and grazed here.
If there are any complaints, they can claim that Trump is beastaphobic and wants to suppress the vote because he’s a homo-sapiens supremacist, another good reason why Pelosy and Schiff should have him impeached.
With the right to vote established, angry young progressives can descend upon farms and start marrying the livestock in a collection of June weddings that won’t be soon forgotten. The newlyweds can register for the 2020 election where it’s a cinch they will be voting for the candidate who will end the practice of sending cattle to the butcher rather than for Trump, who is a regular steaks and burgers kind of guy. This will turn red states blue and win the election for the democrat.
Once in office, the new president will rule that it is murder for beef farmers to send someone’s spouse to the slaughterhouse, and charge dairy farmers with sexual assault if they put their dirty hands on someone’s wife. This will make the practice of raising animals for consumption unprofitable and put the evil farmers, milk and cheese producers, slaughterhouses, and butcher shops out of business. As for the other dictates of the New Green Deal, the new president will make gasoline powered cars and airplanes obsolete, and the coal and uranium fueled generators will be switched over to solar panels and windmills.
So, if you want Trump out of the White House, and you want to save the planet by having to use your legs to get anywhere, and having to endure severe blackouts and brownouts, and by giving up meat, milk, and cheese, you should get behind the push to make bestiality the law of the land. Then get out there and rock the vote and laugh when Trump has to moo-ve out of the White House. And when the economy craters, and starvation begins to settle in, you can join the mainstream media by repeating over and over again, “It’s all Trump’s fault! It’s all Trump’s fault!”
Bruce Van Hoozen